WARNING: This is not going to be a peppy post. If you are inclined to be depressed today, you should probably skip me and surf somewhere else.

I'm just not feeling all that peppy lately. Maybe it's the heat. Maybe it's the fact that next year this country is going to elect a new president, and if Senator Thompson doesn't get on the ball and throw his hat in the ring, I think we're going to be out of luck for a viable Republican candidate. If I think about having to say "President Clinton" again, I may get a bleeding ulcer, so I'm not going to think about that now.

It could be the fact that Iran is getting more and more dangerous by the day, and no one in our media wants to acknowledge it, therefore most people have no idea what a serious threat to our security they have become. I have very little doubt that President Bush is going to do something about this threat before leaving office, especially if it looks like he's going to be handing the reins over to Mrs. Clinton. And when he does, to most people it's going to look like it came out of nowhere.

But I think what is bringing me down the most is what I've been reading in my chronological Bible. I am so looking forward to September 24, because that's the day we finally get to the New Testament, the birth of Jesus, the hope of the world. All summer I have been spending time with the prophets, particularly Isaiah and Jeremiah. At least in Isaiah, he often alludes to the coming of Christ. But Jeremiah is just one depressing book. Over and over again, God is telling His people, I'm not going to let you continue in your wickedness. You are about to be punished beyond your wildest nightmares. And then it happens.

But a passage I read a couple of nights ago has really gotten me thinking. It's in Ezekiel 16. I'm not going to write it out because it's long, but click here and you can read it for yourself.

I have never heard God speak about Israel this way before. I am not reading it with a commentary, so I could be completely wrong in my understanding. But it seems like he's talking about pulling His people out of Egypt, where they were enslaved. Then He took her as His bride, dressing her like a queen. And then she turned around and prostituted herself by following the gods of surrounding nations. God sounds so heartbroken and righteously indignant throughout these passages. A few chapters later He is basically saying, "Don't come to me after you've been worshipping your idols. How dare you ask me anything!"

Now, I've been thinking a lot about God's character throughout the prophets. Over and over the refrain is, "I, the LORD, have spoken!" Reading these books, one could get the idea that God is a frustrated parent who has no control over His children. His emotions are so raw, he seems almost... human. But I have to remind myself that I have no concept or understanding of the depths of my God. I am created in his image, not the other way around.

As my pastor preached on a few weeks ago, I think most of us have lost all concept of fearing God. We focus on grace, which is a fantastic message. I am all about grace. Without it, I would be lost with no hope. But I think we often go so far towards grace that we forget how truly vile sin is to our Father. It repulses Him. And yet, because I think I can get away with it, I often choose to sin and ask forgiveness, completely taking advantage of the free gift He has bestowed upon me.

I'm not saying that we should all walk around with our heads ducked, fearing that God is going to strike us with lightening at the slightest whim. But I think if I saw my sin through His eyes, I would think a little bit harder before I chose to go there.

It depresses me to think that I could disappoint Him in the same way the Israelites did. But I have something they didn't have. Christ in me, the hope of Glory. I'm overwhelmed by my need for Him, and His incredible compassion and patience with me.