For some reason I am still unable to upload my Halloween photos. Whenever that issue gets resolved, I'll post my little cuties. Bryant was a monkey (could there be a more appropriate costume?), Bailey was a cheerleader from High School Musical, and Bradley was Superman. They were all too, too cute.

This week I have been plagued with doubt over my decision to homeschool. As we've gotten a few weeks into it, it's hard to remember all the things that drove me to pull them out in the first place. Something about the grass always being greener on the other side.

Last night I asked one of my neighbors who I'm good friends with if I am now the neighborhood weirdo. She paused entirely too long before answering that people were just shocked. It is a calling, she said, and none of us have ever experienced anything like that.

So I spent the rest of the night fretting inside my head that everybody thinks I'm weird. I know if you are a man reading this, that's much less easy to understand than if you are a woman, but just trust me.

My mom reminded me last night that it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, because I didn't start this to please others. I did this because I felt really strongly that the Lord was telling me to. And if He called me to it three weeks ago, I don't think that He would suddenly just change His mind. So I decided that I needed to revisit that aspect and realized that most of what was bothering me had to do with what other people think.

I look around at people in the grocery stores who see me with these obviously school-aged kids and wonder if they are wondering about us. When I send my kids outside to release some energy and they are running around screaming like wild banshees, I wonder what my neighbors are thinking. I wonder what all the ladies at my former bus stop are thinking. In reality, I know that it's most likely none of them are thinking about me at all, at least not more than in passing. I know everyone is far too busy with their own lives to spend time thinking about mine. But it's just whispers from the Enemy, trying to get me to question and doubt. And it works.

So last night the Lord woke me up around 12:30 (using Bryant as the venue) and gave me about 30 minutes of rocking him to think. He reminded me of all the reasons why I'm homeschooling, and what has come out of it so far.

Here are a few:
1) Almost every morning I've had time to get up and actually spend some time with God before the morning rush, which is actually only rushed now on Tuesdays, when we all have to get up and get out of here by about 8:15. Every other day I can let the kids sleep as late as they want. This allows for MUCH better moods in the morning, and much more rested kids.

2) Each day, my kids are actively engaging in Scripture. In the past three weeks, they have memorized Psalm 1. Bradley reads to us out of the book of Mark each morning. And since I'm currently doing a Bible study on the life of Jesus, I'm able to comment and question him on the stories by pulling from the things I've been learning myself. We've had some really great discussions.

3) Bradley has started underlining passages of Scripture in his Bible. There isn't really any rhyme or reason to what he underlines. He's just imitating what he's seen others do. I'm totally fine with that. He's learning that you can be interactive with Scripture. I think it's great.

4) He's also doing an inductive Bible study for kids from Kay Arthur on the book of Jonah. It is so neat. It's written from the perspective of teaching him how to be an investigative reporter and write the story of Jonah. So he's doing all the who, what, where, when and whys, and learning how to apply that to the Bible. It's really fun, and it covers the writing portion of his language arts, all while teaching him the details of the story of Jonah.

5) Bailey's reading has improved dramatically. She struggles so much more than Bradley did, but we are finding things that work for her. I'm loving the time with her in my lap really working hard to sound out her stories. At times I start to get so impatient, and this patience that can only come from the Lord just washes over me. It is so sweet.

6) Bradley is reading several chapters a day of good literature. They are all stories with fascinating characters and stories that teach valuable character lessons. He never complains about his reading assignments (well - never may be strong, but it's very minimal.) At times he actually reads farther than he has to because he's so into it. This is one of my favorite things by far.

7) My kids are learning to enjoy being with each other. Yes, they still fight occasionally. But because they are together all day and serving as each other's primary playmate, they are getting along so much better than they were when they saw each other far less. It's quite a phenomenon.

8) Bradley is taking piano and has ample time to practice each day. He is hungry for it and doing incredibly well. I can't wait for the house to be filled with sounds of him playing.

9) They are both taking swimming at the rec center for p.e. I love that they are getting this training in the four basic strokes so they can be competitive swimmers if they want to be, but at the very least have a sport that they can do for the rest of their lives. My granddaddy swam until he was 90 years old. I love that they are building this foundation that we just wouldn't have had time for when they were in school.

10) NO HOMEWORK!!! :)

These are the main ones that have come to mind. But it all boils down to the fact that I'm able to teach them what I want them to learn, and at a pace that is perfectly suited to each of them. I'm learning that Bailey understands much more mathematically than I ever knew. I'm learning that it's okay to not start school until 10:00 a.m. if Bryant is needing extra attention that day. Flexibility hasn't ever been a strong suit of mine, so this is definitely stretching a new character point in me.

Bottom line: I love my kids. Right now I think this is what's best for them. None of the other stuff matters. As my good friend Kristen says, I don't think I'm going to see them to adulthood and look back thinking, I sure do wish I had spent less time with them when they were growing up.